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How to recover quickly from setbacks

How to recover quickly from setbacks - The Change Journey | Resilient Ramona

Resilient Ramona is here to help you recover from difficult conditions. Her flower, the Pine symbolises emotional strength.

When you start out on your Change Journey, you’ll be excited and positive and feel like nothing is going to stop you. However that euphoria slowly dries up when life gets in the way; someone may upset you, something unexpected may happen, you get unmotivated or hit a hurdle. All of these things will happen at some point on your journey and it’s unrealistic to think now that you’ve embarked on your Change Journey that you’ll know skip down the golden path to your goals, because that's not going to happen.

It’s when these things happen that you are going to bring Resilient Ramona into your life to help you to get back on track. Here’s how it will work: a setback will occur, you're going to be in the moment, it's going to be really emotional and you can't see why something's happening. You may be angry or frustrated, disappointed or sad. During the moment (the day or couple of days) allow yourself to feel those emotions. Allow yourself time to process that emotion and get through it.

Then when you're ready to get back on track, that's when you bring in your Resilient Ramona and look for the meaning or the lesson in whatever it is that happened. It’s about changing your perspective on what happened and look at the reasons why or look at the situation from the other person’s perspective. Looking for what the positive message is that you can take from the situation to help you move forward. Maybe that person you wanted to work with but didn’t, wasn't really aligned with your values and it would have never worked out. Or maybe another opportunity is coming up which is ten times better than the one you just lost.

Maybe you can’t see the reasons just yet, but even being open to the fact that there is one, can help you recover faster. As you continue to move down your Change Journey, you’ll discover you look back more and more on “missed opportunities” and realise they were a good thing. That event that had you so upset at the time, was actually a godsend and you’re glad it happened.

The important thing however to ensure that when setbacks occur you aren’t dampening your emotions or not allowing them to express themselves as this can be even more detrimental to your Change Journey. It’s about being aware of our emotions (good and bad) and feeling them in all situations.

Spend some time googling resilience quotes if you’re really stuck. You’ll find so many successful people have had major setbacks in their lives but continue on despite them.

A beautiful quote from Michael Jordan is “I've missed more than 9000 shots in my career, I've lost almost 300 games. 26 times I have been trusted to take the game winning shot and missed. I’ve failed over and over and over again in my life, and that's why I succeed.”

Imagine if Michael Jordan didn’t have any resilience. Imagine if when he missed the first one of those winning shots, he stayed in his negativity and labelled himself as a failure. That’s where he would have come unstuck and not been successful. So when you experience a setback, allow the emotion but try not to stay there too long. Bring in Resilient Ramona, acknowledge what went wrong, feel the feelings, then dust yourself off and pick yourself back up again and hit the road to continue on your Change Journey.

A nice little resilience phrase I use in the book is “this too shall pass” and I know it's a tacky overused phrase, but it's so true. Take a moment right now and think back about a time where something bad happened, where you actually felt like your world was caving in and you felt that no one else in the world has ever felt as bad as you do now. You couldn’t see the light, you couldn’t see the hurt or grief or anger subsiding, it was just like a mountain on top of you. But days ticked over into weeks and weeks into months and months into years and you’re still here, despite whatever that even was that made you feel so terrible. So in fact you are living proof that “this too shall pass”, because it has before and it will again.

In his book “I Can See Clearly Now” Wayne Dyer looks back on his life and reflects on how the things that had happened have served him or served a greater purpose, despite how they felt when he was experiencing them. Wayne writes “I know that every single encounter every challenge, and every situation, are all spectacular threads in a tapestry that represents and defines my life and I am deeply grateful for all of it.”

Resilient Ramona is here to remind you that events in your life always have a bigger purpose, it’s just a matter of looking for it.

When I look back at a business that I was running, one that I labelled as a failure, when I actually look back at just the positives, there are many. The biggest one being that I met so many amazing people. I was actually at a function the other night and I looked around the room and I thought, if I hadn't have done that business, I wouldn't know anybody in this room (I probably knew about 30 people out of the 100).

House buying is also a great example of this where you really think this is the perfect house and then that house gets sold to someone else and then another house comes on the market and it's really great and you think to yourself I'm so glad I didn't buy that another house, this one is so much better.

That's the beauty of Resilient Ramona. If you had dwelled on that house that you get and you were angry at the other buyers and you sat in the negative energy feeling resentful and angry, the new house can't come to you because you're so focused on what you didn't get rather than what is possible.

To sum up Resilient Ramona… it’s about going forward on your journey until you hit a setback. At that time, allow yourself to feel the feels and then when you are ready to move on, bringing in your Resilient Ramona and look for how you can feel positive about the event or how can you look back on it with a different perspective.


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